The morning after everything became less extraordinary Came too late. I was just myself again. A woman, not a puzzle Or piece of anything I never wanted to go back to a place where Colors did not radiate And time progressed naturally. Still, I couldn’t keep up this rhythm alone And now at night, nothing dances But at least for a time They all thought I was good.

I am sitting up in a bed that is not mine and staring at a smooth white ceiling. The doctor has just departed my hospital room. In the blank space that is left   I have been envisioning home and an empty glass bottle etched with lilacs and the word “Bohemian” which lives in my top dresser drawer. It once contained perfume I purchased when I was 20 and vacationing in New York.  When I gave it a little trial spritz, the air was exchanged for something secret and magical. It str

There are sometimes small nebulous moments, like tonight, where I am suddenly aware of the thrum of . my heartbeat. These moments always come at random. It’s a bit confusing - my heart isn’t beating any faster than normal - or slower. Other times I feel the urge to count the breaths I take. My whole weekend was a bit of a haze. I accomplished virtually nothing. I was stuck in my head. Rehashing the past and trying to imagine a future that is probably impossible or unlikely at

I am waiting for answers that only time and life can give me with varying degrees of patience. Need more book time and less instant gratification, as usual. I have many selves, doubts, and hearts.  3. Currently trying to be more beautiful but not overly so. I don’t want to catch the eyes of nefarious men. So be the small thing. Be dainty but strong. I tell myself I’m resourceful and have perseverance. I tell myself to look wide eyed into the future but am largely ashamed of

Hello Wednesday! (waves and winks ) You’ve got the cutest little name for a day of the week. I mean… I think Wednesday Addams is...

It’s not the worst thing, but certainly not the greatest, when I try to imagine myself through the eyes of some rejecting entity. I (or...

I have nothing new to say about my father. Or being in the “dead fathers club.” I’ll let this picture say it all. In the years that...

A crazy good thing: Time Magazine expressed interest in a pitch I sent them. A largely anticipated turn of events that shouldn’t qualify...

I’ve been shaking hands with a weird sort of peace lately. It’s warm and foreign and strange and comforting - I’m afraid to completely...

Life is tilt-a-whirling. But wait - I used to like that amusement park ride, and that’s too mild to describe this upheaval anyway. I...

I am sitting on the cusp on Sunday, 3/9, about to unwillingly “spring forward.” Thought it might do me (and probably only me) some good...

I am being smothered by a 10 pound cat tonight - in the best way, of course. She’s planted herself on my stomach and is keeping me warm....

It has been about 6 months since I left: “Miserable Energy and Gaslighting.” As happy as I am with my new career - my last job, I am sad...

New Year’s Eve Eve and am currently without my car. Unfortunate turn of events = my car is undergoing an extensive… uhhh… series of...

For the last 30 minutes I've been sitting on the couch scrolling through old entries and staring at my Christmas tree. Every color of...

A few weeks have passed since my last entry. Life is full of movement. I am sickened by the results of the election and am eating my...

The third anniversary of my dad’s passing is rapidly approaching. That whole era - his death and events leading up to it - I try to...

Another lovely weekend is here. Lovely? Lazy? Same thing? I am 34 now. claps…. 34 times! That’s right, as of 10/16 I am in my mid-...

If “the energy” from this past weekend could be manifested into a person, she would be: A nondescript woman with cherry brown hair,...

Someone recently asked me what hope meant to me. How I would define it (okay, let me just say it, it was in therapy.) I’ve been tripping...