Fire hydrant

This week hasn’t been great. Been putting out many small to medium fires - some of which are still burning a little. Being a fire hydrant is draining.

I’m this. I’m that. I know who I am for the most part. I don’t walk around absorbing other people’s personalities like I did when I was younger. Yet I’m not at peace. I want to be - and dammit, I’m trying. I’m off all social media other than this blog. It’s toxic. Everyone pretending. A bunch of horse shit. There’s no point in saying anything but the truth. It’s so hard to find that.

I wish I was grateful. Maybe that would bring me peace. Gratitude is a habit. Thanking God. Making the best of what I have. I have quite a bit. My positive memory bank is running empty. I replay old ones a lot.

I’m so spent.